Calcium, Campaigns, and a Single Oxford Comma.

Delicious skim milk from the local milkery. Best way to start off the day, dontcha know. I've never expected to become much of a milk connoisseur, but I can tell you the exact descending order, by quality, of the brands of skim milk around this town. This is number one. It might even be the best in the world. I'm lucky to live here at the moment, so I guess I'd better—wait for it—exploit this opportunity for all it's worth.

Were you expecting a pun? You did not receive a pun. Count your blessings. It's a great day to be alive.

I have some kind of personal rule, I guess, where I can't blog without extreme duress unless it's bright and early in the morning. I guess I feel like my future corporate overseers will look back and judge me on how I used every hour of the day except six to eight in the morning, since technically universal health care requires a man to shower and eat at least one meal a day; not even a highly-driven corporate tycoon and burgeoning captain of industry like myself can be counted exempt therefrom. (Speaking as though these accolades have already come to pass.)

I mean, if we're judging by my presence and we are so thoroughly underwhelmed by my hyper-benign social networking presence, what are we going to fail to hire me for? That's correct. Insufficient hygiene and late- to mid-morning blogging. That is my genuine fear. A man must have standards; these are mine.

Apart from calcium intake and blogging schedules, other standards of mine include: loving my job. Seriously and truly. I've had to shift around far too many of my hours over the last few weeks for a rather time-consuming midterm group project (which turned out very well, I'm happy to tell you). I hope the rest of my group projects will be able to meet at times convenient to myself alone. Because the hours between six and eight in the morning are not to be trifled with, and the legitimacy of my presidential and gubernatorial campaigns depend on timely blogging, skim milk consumption, and incredible student job. No pressure.